Who Are These Guys? Whenever I happen to trip over another story about my Senator, a well-known Arizona maverick, a brief question pops up in my mind: Who are all these John McCains? You may think you know some of them, and know them well. There's the John McCain who teamed with Joe Lieberman to pass the gun trigger-lock law, infuriating hard-line Second Amendment backers. Then there's the McCain who linked arms with Wisconsin Democrat Russ Feingold to reform campaign finance laws, annoying those who may have viewed such reform as prohibitive to their Party's game plan. Who can forget the John McCain who coupled with Teddy Kennedy not just once - on an education bill - but twice, with recent legislation where the daunting problem of illegal immigration is concerned? He even got together with John Kerry a few years back, trying to force Internet websites to more openly display their privacy policies. Without regard to the nuts and bolts of his ideas, the usual dolts went nuts over McCain's benign approach to the vilified opposition. Throw in his occasional swipes at Rush Limbaugh - McCain not long ago compared him to "a circus clown" - and you have a Senator who has been in power for a very long time, who has the media on a string and who can apparently connect himself to any issue without fear of recrimination. Everyone knows it, and envies him his spot in the political world, yet he is still loathed more than loved by his Party's base (his loyal Arizona constituency notwithstanding). There are two fresh reasons to believe that McCain will attempt to run the White House gauntlet in 2008, although few ever doubted he would. The first reason just showed up here in Arizona. The other arrived in an envelope from one of my beloved operatives in the battleground state of Michigan. When in the Valley of the Sun, our Senator stands on some very conservative ground. For example, he recently announced his support of an amendment to the State constitution, strictly defining marriage as a contract between a male and a female, essentially excluding homosexuals from that hallowed institution. Since our state legislators - Republicans mostly - tend to do as little as humanly possible, they would prefer to have this issue hashed out at the ballot box, in a predictable and orderly fashion. This was a plum no-brainer for McCain, since he doesn't really have to deal with it. If this tap dance generates any good feelings among right-wing voters, he'll be glad to wrangle them in. And he'll need them, especially if those same conservatives happen to notice what he's been peddling lately in the Blue States. For starters, anyone represented by McCain should be peeved that he's playing the influence game nationally when he's supposed to be taking care of business in his home state. However, he's done this since he was first hired, and we've never seemed to mind before. Wooing other states' citizens on this particular topic, though, should drive Arizona's lumpen conservatives to their pitchforks and torches. The following is the text of the Michigan letter, in its entirety. "Dear Fellow Citizen," he writes. "I'll give it to you straight: We have a growing crisis on our hands... one that seldom gets the attention it deserves. I'm speaking about global warming." See, McCain knows this is anathema to most conservatives, who agree with President Bush that science ain't what it used to be. But he also knows that Michigan chose him over Bush in the 2000 primaries, due in large part to insurgent Democrats and Independents. "And left unchecked, we can expect glaciers and polar ice caps to melt, severe storms to become more frequent, prolonged droughts to devastate agricultural lands, sea levels to rise and entire ecostystems to be thrown out of balance." Sounds pretty serious if taken at face value, so let's just assume he's right, because he's always right - just ask him. He got us past that filibuster crisis, didn't he? Besides, a genuine American war hero would never lie to the people, or try to needlessly frighten them. "That's why I am co-authorizing bi-partisan legislation in the Senate that will engage America in solving this problem. The bill is called the McCain-Lieberman Climate Stewardship Act, and its foundation lies in a revolutionary, market-based approach to reducing pollution that was first developed by an innovative group named Environmental Defense." Say what? A group called Environmental Defense first developed pollution? And they call themselves innovative? "When Senator Joe Lieberman and I first introduced the Climate Stewardship Act in 2003, the Washington pundits and insiders didn't give it much of a chance. But, when the Environmental Defense Global Warming Action Network swung into action, 42 of my fellow Senators stood with me. The insiders and special interests were shocked." Special Interests Shocked by GWAN! That's odd; I don't recall ever seeing that headline. A whopping 42 Senators, though, that's impressive... How many Senators are there, anyway? Something else, something really big I'm thinking, must have taken place back in '03 to overshadow this McCain mutiny, but I can't quite remember that event, either. Tempus Fugit. "Please don't shy away from this fight. Global warming is indeed a large and complex problem. But inaction is just not an option - because the longer we wait, the worse it will get." Oh, yeah. That's what it was. "I look forward to working together on behalf of our future. Thank you. Sincerely, Senator John McCain." On the back of the page (two-sided printing saves trees, you know), there's an article detailing how global warming will surely lead to world hunger, and another article about how much ExxonMobil shareholders truly do care about this issue. It's all from page eight of the September/October edition of World Watch, and it's just too weird to think about for more than a few minutes. With feet planted firmly on either side of the fence, these John McCains are already trolling for any vote they can get. That may help them in the general election, but they've got to get through the primaries first, which always seem to be held under a full moon for some reason. This sort of stunt may help up there in Michigan, but it sure won't play in any of the red states, all of which must be won in order to secure the nomination. His Republican competitors will be sure to have a copy of this letter in the old war chest. In trying to be all things to all people, The Maverick may have alienated those rabid few who matter the most. By reaching out to the enemy, the Senator from Arizona may have just shot himself in the foot. Then again, unlike our current president, John McCain has always had a more realistic sense of who "the enemy" really is. Paul Heller 8/29/05 << back to the archives
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